www.heavy-metal.co.uk

'Fresh air! Getcha Fresh air! Gather 'round ladies, I'm not 'ere today and gorrrnnn tommorah! You look a bit 'peeky' darlin', why bother trying to evolve gills when we've got Fresh air, larvelly Fresh air! New or part worn the choice is yours. I'm not saying 60p a litre, not 50, 40 or 30p a litre. I'm talkin' freshly harvested air, gathered in a former war torn republic by our highly trained staff of blind landmine victims, we pass the savings on to you! Fresh air, getcha fresh air!'

WARNING: Contents may settle due to the discoveries of Sir Isaac Newton. You home is at risk if you set fire to it. Conditions are subject to change and work only as part of a calorie controlled diet.

And whilst we're at it, I've got a couple of cans of dehydrated water that I'm selling for a snip.

I'm sure José would like to buy them to use in washing the collection of bridges he bought off me a few months back...

You mean people still buy these things .....? , God help us .

For once, Arty, I'm forced to agree with you.... ;->